Bored!!:)

- In a Hollywood marriage it's a success if it outlasts milk!:)

- I'm not random, I just think faster than you do!

- I ran out of sick days sooo.... I'm calling in dead!

- I didn't fall I was testing gravity ANDDD it still works!!!

-I Hate It When People Ask

1)Can I ask you a question? (didnt gimme a choice there, did ya sunshine?)

2) Did you get a haircut? (no it shrunk..!!)

3) Did you lose weight? (yeah. it just vanished!)

4) Did you catch a fish? (nope. i talked it into giving himself up.)

5) *waiter* Table for how many? (one hundred and twelve. us 3 would like to switch seats every 4 minutes)

6) Were you sitting there? (yes. me and my imaginary friend steve.)

7) Your not wearing that out are you? (actually i was planning on going naked)

8) Is that yours? (no i stole it...!)

9) *watching a trick* Am i supposed to pick a card? (no your supposed to pick your nose)

10) Are you going to eat that? (only if you want it)

11) *doctor* How are you today? (Great! I just like your company(: )

12) *clerk at store* Is that all? (why? wasnt this enough??)

13) Where did you get that accent? (i bought it on ebay)

14) Hey, are you moving? (nope. we just like to pack our stuff up in boxes every week)

15) Are you always funny? (no, i only make a special effort on tuesdays and thursdays)

-I laugh three times when I hear a joke.

Once when it is told.
A second time when someone
explains it to me.
And, a third time five minutes later
when I actually get it

-".Sticks and stones may break my bones but names willnever hurt me."

How bout I throw a Dictionary at you & we see what happens?

-today

Today, while driving to school, I thought I smelled something burning, and immediately turned down my music. I'm not sure how that helped

-"ha! you flinched" "well yeah, you almost just punched me in the face!"

Vending Machines,

/ / // // / // // /// /// /// /// /// /// /// /// /// // / Kill four times more people each year

T H E N S H A R K S D O
& this is why imma stop shaking them...

- Your 5 and you have a cell phone?? Who do you talk to elmo?

- Kelsy haha

- /// The only thing you have to fear ///

........................is fear itself.......................

[( &+ spiders )] ♥

- s t u p i d s p i d e r s.